Ladies and Gentlemen of the class of ’99
If I could offer you only one tip
for the future, sunscreen would be it. The long term benefits of sunscreen
have been proved by scientists whereas the rest of my advice has no basis
more reliable
than my own meandering experience…
I will dispense this
advice now.
Enjoy the power and beauty of your youth; oh never mind; you will not understand the power and beauty of your youth until they have faded. But
trust me, in 20 years you’ll look back at photos of yourself and recall in a
way you can’t grasp now, how much possibility lay before you and how fabulous
you really looked….You’re not as fat as you imagine.
Don’t worry about the
future; or worry, but know that worrying is as effective as trying to solve
an algebra equation by chewing bubblegum. The real troubles in your life are
apt to be things that
never crossed your worried mind; the kind that
blindside you at 4pm on some idle Tuesday.
Do one thing everyday that scares
you.
Sing.
Don’t be reckless with other people’s hearts, don’t put up with people who are reckless with yours.
Floss.
Don’t waste your time on jealousy;
sometimes you’re ahead, sometimes you’re behind…the race is long, and in the
end, it’s only with yourself.
Remember the compliments you receive, forget
the insults; if you succeed in doing this, tell me how.
Keep your old love
letters, throw away your old bank statements.
Stretch.
Don’t feel guilty if you
don’t know what you want to do with your life…the most interesting people I
know didn’t know at 22 what they wanted to do with their lives, some of the
most interesting 40 year
olds I know still don’t.
Get plenty of calcium.
Be
kind to your knees, you’ll miss them when they’re gone.
Maybe you’ll marry,
maybe you won’t, maybe you’ll have children, maybe you won’t, maybe you’ll
divorce at 40, maybe you’ll dance the funky chicken on your 75th wedding
anniversary…what ever you do, don’t congratulate yourself too much or berate
yourself either – your choices are half chance, so are everybody else’s.
Enjoy your body, use it every way you can…don’t be afraid of it, or what
other people
think of it, it’s the greatest instrument you’ll ever own.
Dance…even if you have nowhere to do it but in your own living room.
Read the
directions, even if you don’t follow them.
Do NOT read beauty magazines, they
will only make you feel ugly.
Get to know your parents, you never know when
they’ll be gone for good. Be nice to your siblings; they are the best link
to your past and the people most likely to stick with you in the future.
Understand that friends come and go, but for the precious few you should hold
on. Work hard to bridge the gaps in geography and lifestyle because the
older you get, the more you need the people you knew when you were young.
Live in New York City once, but leave before it makes you hard; live in
Northern California once, but leave before it makes you soft.
Travel.
Accept
certain inalienable truths, prices will rise, politicians will philander,
you too will get old, and when you do you’ll fantasize that when you were
young prices were reasonable, politicians were
noble and children respected
their elders.
Respect your elders.
Don’t expect anyone else to support you.
Maybe you have a trust fund, maybe you have a wealthy spouse; but you never
know when either one might run out.
Don’t mess too much with your hair, or
by the time you're 40, it will look 85.
Be careful whose advice you buy,
but, be patient with those who supply it. Advice is a form of nostalgia,
dispensing it is a way of fishing the past from the disposal, wiping it off,
painting over the
ugly parts and recycling it for more than it’s worth.
But trust me on the sunscreen.
