Thursday, November 29, 2012

Sean's TMI Thursday

-Tough one.  I really do care about my family.  It is number one on my list of priorities.  I have also learned that when something is freely given, it is sometimes thought by the recipient to be worth what the recipient paid for it...and it was free.  I have seen my brothers and my parents work very hard for what they had, only to give it to other family in need, but the gift was rarely appreciated for what it was, and for the work that went into it.
Therefore, I would have to do a lot of thinking about how to make my family comfortable and treat them well, but make it appreciated also.  I am not sure I can do that alone, so I guess I would seek professional advice from several others on how to dole out what is needed by my family, and do it in a way that was appreciated.
-Friends are next in line, after family.  I don't feel quite the dedication to them.  But, I would like to make them comfortable also.  I would love to start a foundation, of sorts, that loans interest free money to those who want to work for it...kind of like many company IRA's are...matching donations.
Ex's get nothing.  What's the old saying, "If you can't handle the worst of me, you can't have the best of me" or something like that.
- Some dental work that is quasi-optional first.  A personal trainer also.  And a vacation spot in the mountains somewhere, so that I and my friends can ski every winter and return to a nice place with a wood burning fireplace for the evening.  Then, a vacation spot in warm weather too.  Most of my joy comes from seeing others happy, and everything I might do would be done with that in mind.
Oh, yeah...and, anything that Adam Levine asks for.  
 -  Lots...most of it actually.  And I don't want my name on anything...just want to make sure the money is used for what is needed most.  I would be making most of these decisions, but would setup a group of my friends to advise me. 
-  None.  Besides withholding it from those who don't deserve it. 
-  Couldn't do it.  It's not me.  

Wednesday, November 21, 2012

Sean's TMI Thursday


1. Do you travel or stay local? Family or Friends? Host or Guest?
 We have done a little of both...when the kids were really small, it was a trip home for a feast with the extended family.  Not so much anymore, and with all of the turmoil in my immediate family right now, it is really tough to get things going.  I prefer to host a large gathering of family and any close friends that might need a little love.  Last year was pretty satisfying...I volunteered at a kitchen and spent half the day helping others...worked my can off in the kitchen, but I loved it.  Except for the other dozen or so people working in the kitchen, no one ever saw me there or knew what I had done....and that was OK with me.
This year, a small family gathering at my place, if I can get them here, and then out of town for the weekend.  I still get to fix a scratch apple pie, but I'm skipping the pumpkin pie this year for a chocolate cream pie.
2. Parade: Love it? Leave it? Never let it go?
The parade was always a lot of fun, especially with the kids.  Last year, there were a couple of band students from the High School in the Macy's band and that made it exciting too.  This year, my grandson will be here and I will make sure he watches it.
3. Favorite Food?
I like the whole thing.  Turkey, mashed potatoes, gravy is a must, sweet potatoes, brussel sprouts, stuffing, and several desserts.
4. Favorite holiday movie or do you watch football?
5. If you do holiday decorations, for which holiday and when?
Decorate only for Christmas...start around now and take them down shortly after Christmas.
6. Black Friday. Thoughts? Feelings? Soapbox?
Hate it.  Leave me out.  Never go, never will.  You'll see me Christmas shopping along side Loki in mid to late December.

People traditionally give thanks on Thanksgiving. What are you thankful for?
The last few years have been very difficult, and I am unsure about the next few as well.  I am not comfortable without a plan, and there is none right now.  But, I am closer to one of my sons now than I have ever been, and I am thankful for that.  My grandson has potential, and I want to help him reach that potential.  But, I have to find a way to resolve my inner conflict ,and get happy with myself. 

Sunday, November 18, 2012

An update

It's been a while since I added anything of any consequence to the blog...except, of course, for Sean's TMI Thursday responses.  I have been trying to understand myself better, to figure out what I really want.  I suppose, at my age, it's about time. 

After several months of just hooking up with whoever was around (to a degree...although I did use some discretion), I have realized that those hookups are really not very satisfying.  Yeah, it's fun to get off, but certainly nothing to be proud of. 

Plus, I found someone I really like.  It may or may not work out with him, but, regardless, I already like myself better and feel less like a slut.  I have always been one to commit to something, whether that is an idea, a candidate, a gal, and why should a guy be any different.  If this works out, I will be out of the market.  I really want that....want someone I trust who trusts me.  I hope to always want to look, but I won't be touching if we agree on that. 

Wish me luck.

My other issue is what to do about my family and friends.  I'm not out to any of them.  I don't want to live like that any more, but, frankly, I'm concerned about the reaction.  Truthfully, I have a number of other personal issues in my family that also affect what happens, but it would not be fair to my family members to discuss those here. 

As of now, my new BF and I have had a few dates, and spent a lot of time on IM and the phone.  I won't be talking about our sexcapades on here or anywhere because I am too traditional for that.  We have a date on Friday in DC...he is visiting friends there, and invited me to join him.  I really want to do that.  It will be fun. 


Friday, November 16, 2012

TMI Answers


Sean from has been doing TMI Thursday where he asks questions for his readers to answer in comments, or in their own blog.  For this week....  

1. When did you first know you were an adult?

When my son was born.  It really set in then...of course there have been numerous times when I still don't act like it.
2. Where were you when you first thought, "I'm old!"

It first hit me after I was separated from my wife and started to look for someone for comfort.  I suddenly realized that no one my age held any interest for me.  And, likewise, assumed they all felt the same way.  I soon learned that there are a lot of younger men who like older guys.  It's a whole culture.  Thankfully.
3. What was your best year?
  • This is a tough one.  I like to think that it is yet to come.  But if I had to pick, it would be 1986. Had a ton of fun, lots of great friends, learned to snow ski and had a blast, and met someone I really liked a lot.
4. Have you become your parents?
Sometimes I have, but not exactly. 
5. Gray hair:
 - Is it sexy?  Of course it is...on the right package.
- How much do you have and where? Way more than I like to admit to.  I guess I can say I still have some dark hair.
          - Where is the best or worst place you have it? The beard, for sure.

How is sex different now?

Sex is great, actually much better than it ever was.  But now, it's not just an orgasm, but a whole event.  The orgasm is just a bit of icing at the end.